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Lessons from my Single Season: To All Who Are Waiting!

As one year ends and a new one begins with me exactly where I was this time last year: still single, I have found myself giving in to feelings of failure. I look back and wonder, "Could I have done more of __________? Did I need to do less of __________? What did I do wrong?" The past few days, I've been trying to reframe my thinking. I'm instead trying to focus on what this season has taught, and is continuing to teach me.  Seasons of waiting can feel like VERY isolating places to be at times. So as scary as it is, I decided to bring back my blog after a three and a half year hiatus to share three things I've learned in the latest chapter of my single season of waiting. My hope is that if nothing else, it can remind others that they are not alone!  1. Use Your Waiting Time To Work on Yourself  I'll be honest, I used to HATE the phrase “work on yourself.” To me it meant making BIG changes all at once, and I am way too good at putting immense pressure on myself
Recent posts

An Ode to the Beach

I ascend the sandy hill, flip flops in hand, dressed in my favorite black leggings and a t-shirt. I love the feel of the soft sand between my toes. I can't see the ocean yet, but I can hear wave after wave crashing onto the shore. I reach the top of the hill and I see the breathtakingly beautiful blue ocean stretching as far as I can see out in front of me, to my left, to my right. I pause, set my flip flops down, and simply stand there for a moment, and take it all in before descending the hill. I walk as close to the water as possible. It is high tide, so powerful waves crash and soak my leggings straight through. But I don't mind. The wet sand sticks to my wet toes as I walk further and further. Time passes, but I hardly notice. Later, I change into my swimsuit and head down to the water. We measure the temperature, 63 degrees, but that is not going to stop me. I dive in headfirst. My whole body immediately starts to shake, but soon I am used to the cold. As the waves co

A Round of Applause for Small Steps

   The start of spring brings a lot of things: warmer weather, longer days, greener trees, and beautiful flowers. In the world of education it also brings the dawn of testing season. In classrooms across the country, it brings lots of review, and of course lost of review games. On Friday, we were playing a review game that covered some of the reading terminology we have learned this year. Before we started the games, I split my kids up into teams, and explained that each round would have a winner. I reminded them about the importance of good sportsmanship, and being happy for each other, even if their team did not win.     I thought that surely by the end of the first round, their competitive juices would be in full force and we would have to pause the game and have a repeat conversation. Instead, this group of third graders fed me a slice of humble pie. As the winning team of the first round was displayed on our Smart Board, the rest of the class burst into a huge round of applause

How Can I Be Enough?

How can I be enough? I've asked many times before You tell me I have strength, But my weakness is so much more I'm reserved, shy, and impatient And prone to self-doubt too These weaknesses stand in the way Of what I know I should do My mistakes, my missteps are many Falling short I will always be I strive daily to give my best But it is not enough you see How can I be enough? I plead, eyes filled with tears My Savior answers me with love To silence all my fears I look upon your weakness And I am filled with love You see, weaknesses help you remember That true strength comes from above Of course your mistakes are many But I get to watch you grow Step by step you have come so far Though we have so far to go I wish for you to remember That within, you have my light As you follow in my footsteps It will grow ever so bright Your strengths are gifts from above That I have made a part of you Ask in faith, I'

Can Weaknesses be Strengths in Disguise?

    One of my favorite scriptures from the Book of Mormon is Ether 12:27. I've loved this scripture for a long time, but this week it took on a whole new meaning for me. It reads: "And if men come unto me, I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."     I've always been a very reserved and sensitive person. In my mind, these have always been two of my most glaring weaknesses. I've always wanted to become that person who can walk into a room filled with people and make everyone feel like a best friend. Instead, I walk into a room filled with people, and feel instantly overwhelmed. I've always wanted to be the person that can shake things off, truly embrace imperfection, and just move on. Instead, my mind goes in relentless circles

Rest in Peace, Grandpa Freeman

    Yesterday we had the privilege of celebrating my Grandpa Freeman's 93 year long life. The highlight of the services for me was the graveside service. My grandpa bravely enlisted in the Navy at age 17 and fought in World War II, so he received military honors proceeding his burial at Quantico National Cemetary. It was incredibly moving to witness the bugler playing "Taps" as the American flag sat draped over the casket. It was a beautiful testament to a lifelong example of bravery, courage, and persevering against all odds.       Grandpa was one of those rare individuals that constantly radiated pure joy. His smile lit up every room he was in, and his laugh could fill any space. His larger than life personality and his zest for simply living drew people in. He loved nothing more than to make others laugh. I remember anytime he would come over to our house, my sisters and I would sit around him in awe as he explained to us that his hearing aids actually had secret ante

That Time I Totaled My Car...

    After an unfortunate accident last week, my beloved first car was declared to be totaled, because the cost of the repairs was higher than the value of the car .  It wasn't until I learned last week that my car was totaled that I realized how attached I'd become to it. Sure it's value was low in dollars, but to me it's value was sky high. So naturally I decided to try to capture in a blog post why this car was so special to me.     I bought this 2002 Honda Cr-V back in July of 2015, just a month before I was about to start my first year of teaching. I soon realized that this car had "character." For a long time, its brakes would squeak VERY loudly and VERY often, thus announcing my arrival at a stoplight, stop sign, or into a parking spot. Anytime I had to make a tight turn, the steering wheel would make this horrific grinding noise that always greatly concerned any passengers in the car with me. It also had a center console that despite MANY attempts