I've titled this post "A Semester of Growth," because that really is what this semester has been for me. This growth has come through trials. These trials weren't necessarily huge in the grand scheme of things, but they were trials nonetheless and they were hard. Tonight after I finished writing in my journal, I flipped back to the beginning and was reading some of my past entries. I started writing in this particular journal in January. I was having a really hard time. A few of the entries are SLIGHTLY dramatic, and while I do admit I had a good laugh over them now nearly 4 months later, at the time what I was going through was really hard. As I lay reading in my bed, I thought about what had changed that got me from that point to now, when I really and truly am so happy. Not that I was unhappy before, I just was really struggling. I realized that there were so many things that got me through this particular trial. Phone calls to my mom where she just let me talk and she listened. Amazing best friends who were always there when I needed someone to talk to. Dear past young women leaders from my home ward who sent me messages asking how I was doing. Kneeling in prayer to my Heavenly Father, and letting him know through tears what I was going through and asking for strength. Ultimately, I never would be able to have gotten through this trial, and any others that I will face throughout the rest of my life throughout the Atonement. It dawned on me that I was literally healed through the power of the Atonement. Sure there was some sadness along the way, but the Atonement fixed me. Because of what Christ did for me in the Garden of Gethsemane, he knew what I was feeling and he knew how to fix it. I have grown to appreciate the Atonement more than ever before. I know that I can rely on this incredible sacrifice no matter what. Because the Savior did his Father's will and suffered more than we will ever be able to comprehend, we can be not only forgiven of our sins, but strengthened in times of trial. I remember this trial kind of came out of the blue. One of the first things I thought was, "I want to get through this trial in a way that will make my Heavenly Father proud of me." I hope that I did and that I have proven that in times of trial, I will always turn to Him. I am so thankful for my faith. I know this Gospel is true and that the Atonement is real!
I thought that I had the next couple of years of my life all figured out. I am a prime example of a chronic over-thinker, and the queen of the pro/con list. I had carefully thought out every recent decision I had made. I was settled at the school where I had been working, I had a good apartment and ward, and I had just been accepted to a 2 year long Master's of Education program, which would fulfill one of my long term goals. Yet something still felt off. Despite the fact that I thought I had a good direction in my life, I felt confused and unsettled. It felt like I was trapped inside a box. I would walk in one direction, hit the wall of the box only to turn in another direction and hit another wall. The problem was, I just could not figure out what it was that wasn't right. I started taking the long way driving home from work each day and praying about my concerns. It took a couple of weeks of this before seemingly o...
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